The Democratic Socialist State of Cachard Calia is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Jane Fisher with an even hand, and renowned for its compulsory vegetarianism, free-roaming dinosaurs, and parental licensing program. The compassionate, democratic population of 3.45 billion Cachard Calians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lesbiana. The average income tax rate is 97.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Cachard Calian economy, worth 656 trillion gaylis a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 190,375 gaylis, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Left-wing militias train children how to properly burn down banks, foreign leaders with unpaid parking tickets are often refused entry, elections have become procedural nightmares due to voters persistently rejecting candidates, and concert halls sport signs proclaiming "No Shorts, Sandals or Swastikas". Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cachard Calia's national animal is the Queer Democratic Fox, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Agnosticism.

Cachard Calia is ranked 153,355^th in the world and 91^st in Gay for Most Valuable International Artwork, with zero Bank.